Anonymous said: HOW LONG IS YO COCK?!?!?!??????
Don’t understand how that is relevant to anything.
Gabby shifted from one foot to another as she tried to form words through her anger. “How did you know about us?” her voice was a little more even, something about the Professor’s stance was a little odd. “I mean, we haven’t made anything public…” her voice trailed off slowly. She couldn’t be mad at the Professor for too long without feeling like a fool.
She brought her gaze down to the piece of ‘literature’ in front of them both and shrugged. “I mean, I do want to know more about how we would work without getting hurt. I guess I’m just a little defensive about the subject still.”
The doctor shrugged at the question. “Word travels fast. Large ship, very lenient on protocol. Gossip very common when on ship for so long.”
“Quite alright. Expected this reaction.” By now, Mordin was facing away from her, now going to the desk behind him. “Not why I told you to come here.” In seconds, the Salarian had fished out a large wrapped box from the cabinets and placed it on his desk, in front of her.
“’Practical jokes’ also common around human holidays. Thought I’d try it. Gave ‘bait’ present to get you here to accept real one.” He then smiled. “Merry Christmas, Gabby.”
The engineer paused mid step as she passed her terminal. Something was there that wasn’t there before. It was a gift. She smiled as she twirled the small gift in between her hands, looking for a tag that would tell her who gave this to her.
Suddenly finding it hidden in one of the folds of the paper, her eyebrows shot up in surprise. So, the Professor was her secret Santa? She grinned as she tore the paper open and immediately gaped at the picture on front of what was now obvious as a book.
“What the…?” On the cover of the book was a well built Krogan nestling against a human. “Oh, if this is what I think this is…” she fumed as she turned to head for the elevator, leaving her console uncharacteristically messy. She pounded the panel to start the elevator’s slow lurch towards the main deck, ready to push her fist through that Salarian’s face. “How in the hell did he figure that out?” she asked herself, her face red with anger.
She stomped towards the labs as soon as the elevator doors opened. Once inside, she advanced on the Professor and slammed the book down on his desk. “What is this?!” she asked, her voice sharp and harsh.
When the engineer came stomping into the lab, Mordin had to hold back a chuckle. The prediction he had made about her reaction was nearly impeccable. But he put on his best poker-face for the sake of presentation.
“Ah, Gabby. Good to see you.” His eyes then trailed down to the book she slammed down on the desk. “Something wrong with it? Assumed you would need instruction.”
He shifted a little, hoping to shield the already-hidden real present under the desk behind him.
Now this was an interesting turn of events, indeed! Mordin didn’t know the engineer at all, save a few instances of small talk during the Collector mission, and yet he was supposed to find a gift for her? He needed to pay attention for the next few weeks in order to find a gift that would properly suit her.
And that is exactly what he did. The Salarian doctor opted to shirk a few of his experiments in order to hang around the crew deck in order to eavesdrop on the crew— indirectly gaining information about the young woman that was so often stuck down in Engineering. It was during that time he picked up two facts that would determine what he would give her: she was a workaholic, and it seemed that she had begun to take a romantic interest in Grunt.
With that in mind, he formulated a plan.
Later on, Gabriella would receive a wrapped present strongly resembling a book in her workplace.
Anonymous said: Can you start researching how to make half quarian half human babies, but both from a female of the species?
Hm, sounds familiar to a few other queries I have. See what I can do.
kaylianaable said: Dr. Solus, I was wondering, if you don't mind my asking, what happened to one of the two horns... er... points... er... whatever the two points on your head are called? It looks like one of them was broken off. Was that an old injury?
Yes! Had an altercation with a Krogan Scout team during one of my recon missions. Very painful, but persevered.
RODGERS AND HAMMERSTEIN. …And I’m not even from this galaxy. B| …DON’T JUDGE ME.
Yes, exactly why I say they have no taste!
kar-alorade said: [[OOC: Oh man, I love how Mordin is now Dr. Ruth all of a sudden. SEX ADVICE. SEX ADVICE EVERYWHERE. It is amusing me.]]
((I KNOW. It’s amazing and weird at the same time. XD))
Anonymous said: Hello Professor Solus, I need some sexual advice if you don't mind? How would you deliver oral sex to a male hanar as a male human?
Would recommend extensive study of partner. Starting on wrong tendril could cause very painful death. Neurotoxin.
Anonymous said: Fuck, Marry, Kill. Zaeed, Thane, Garrus.
Don’t want to think about this too much. Anons shouldn’t, either.
Won’t mean I will. Not interested. Just hypothetical.
Anonymous said: Cloaca penetration. yes/no?
No thank you.
Anonymous said: YOU ARE THE VERY MODEL OF A SEXY SALARIAN, YOU'VE STUDIED SPECIES TURIAN, ASARI AND BATARIAN. YOU'RE QUITE GOOD AT CUNNILINGUS (AS A SUBSET OF HETEROSEXUALITY), BECAUSE YOU ARE AN EXPERT DUE TO PROMISCUITY.